Men Say YES

‘Men say no’ was the theme that was assigned to this blogathon.

I disagree! I will write about Men saying YES. Hold your horses, people; I don’t want anyone to say yes to domestic violence or anything of that sort. Confused? Read on.

In many households, whether urban or rural, women work. This work may be a necessity to earn their living, to supplement the household income or a choice to fill up their free time, a hobby or a passion that they wish to pursue outside the boundaries of the kitchen. Whatever the reason, many women work and are largely financially independent. They have a professional and social standing apart from being Mrs. So-n-so. Despite this social standing, however, there is one significant thing that is lacking: acceptance of this standing by their own husbands, in-laws, sometimes even their own families.

So what it boils down to is this: women not only face the proverbial glass ceiling at work, they also have to fight for acceptance by their own family. Many of these women, despite contributing to the family income, have little or no call in making financial decisions like investments or big purchases. Many of these women did not own a credit card until recently. Their technology too was usually ‘hand-me-down’ things from husbands or kids. It customarily is not the woman of the house that makes the final call in times of social or financial crises. And heaven forbid if the woman started to earn more than the man!!! What an injustice! A travesty! A reversal of the laws of Nature! “Thunderstrike and lightening please!”

Looking at the arranged marriage ‘market’, girls who are teachers or work ‘non-demanding’ jobs are highly sought after. The reason is simple. These girls can work, contribute to the family income but can still be relied upon to take care of the home n hearth. So in short, these girls represent the ‘best of both worlds’- independent enough but still connected by an umbilical cord to the home.

We as a country don’t take our working women seriously. We think of our women as cheap labour, not only paid less for the same amount of work but also not given credit where and when it is due.

Since cinema is a mirror of society, I will pull out two cases from the huge hit ‘Chak De India!’. The cases of captain Vidya Sharma and centre forward Preeti Sabharwal.

Vidya is not only the goalkeeper for the Indian Railways team; she has also been provided a government flat and a cushy job. She lands a place in the Indian National team as goalkeeper and later as captain, on her way to lead the Indian National team at the World Cup. Her in-laws and husband, however, remain unimpressed and are more concerned with her being able to fulfill her role as a dutiful daughter-in-law rather than her form and practice for the World Cup. Notwithstanding Vidya’s merits, they are almost ready to break off the marriage if she does not show up in time for a distant relative’s wedding. Clearly, household duties must take precedence over work and duty to the nation!

Preeti Sabharwal is the captain of the Chandigarh state team, plays centre forward (a very significant position, for those not clued in) for the Indian National Hockey Team and plays very well I might add. She is from a more urban setting with her parents obviously being well off. She is engaged to the Vice Captain of the Indian Cricket team. Still, to him, it is of no consequence that Preeti is ready to go to the World Cup. For him, their wedding is more important. He does not see the significance of Preeti’s job or her passion for it at any time. According to him, her ‘true’ destiny lies in becoming his wife! Her own identity is secondary.

Both cases are fictional, coming from a movie. But that does not in any way undermine the sad truth that lurks behind both of them. Women, no matter how successful or accomplished, are somehow programmed to sacrifice their careers and ambitions for the sake of their husband’s career or ego or both. Another important point highlighted from the cases is that this mindset is not of the illiterate, less educated, lower middle class or upper middle class. It spans society as a whole, cutting across the class or education barriers.

These, of course, are big important scenarios. Talking about simple things like driving on the road. Being a woman driver on a Delhi road makes the harrowing experience all the more taxing. The men simple adore playing truant around a woman driver. They just have to overtake from the wrong side, just have to pass comments, and just have to show her that she does not belong in the driver’s seat.

So while the men are not physically hurting the women in these scenarios, and there are no scars, beatings or bruises involved, the hurt is deeper and transcends generations. Male children are ingrained with the philosophy that they hold a more significant place in society than their sisters, that their arrival in the world is a greater cause for celebration than their sisters’ was.

It is now time for the men to break the mindset and accept that they are in no way the superior sex. They are a half of God’s best creation. The other half is equally important. It is only when the halves stand together that they make up the whole. In this blog, I am not arguing as a feminist or a chauvinist. I have no time for any of the ‘ists’ of the world. I only believe in the human race. I only believe in ‘humanists’. I plead the sanctity of the human race as a whole. And it is this that I want people to consider.

So then I ask the men to step up and say YES.

YES to equal pay for equal work

YES to empowered women

YES to sharing household responsibilities equally

YES to women drivers, engineers, pilots and bankers or any other careers for that matter

YES to learning some sportsman spirit and giving up this game of one-upmanship that is being played continuously

So let’s get the men to man up and accept that their masculinity is not threatened by a capable and intelligent woman. Let the men say YES to marriage as a symbiotic relationship and not a parasitic one.

This Blog is part of the Men Say No Blogathon, encouraging men to take up action against the violence faced by women.

More entries to the Blogathon can be read at www.mustbol.in/blogathon. Join further conversation on facebook.com/delhiyouth & twitter.com/mustbol

Just Another Day

I close the book on a phase tonight

I can't call it a night

Though the moon has set already

And the sun knocks on the door,

I can't call it a night.

The one I love is here

He does not know I love him

He does not know what to call me

He does not even know I am here

He does not know I exist.

He sees me from the corner of his eye

It searches for someone else,

I just happen to be

A part of the view.

He looks, he talks

I look on

mesmerised.......

He wants to step in Plato's shoes.

He looks into my eyes,

Platonic, he says.

Something dies inside me

But I don't look away

I need, but an excuse to be around him.

The flower of friendship blooms

Our hands nuture it together.

A love takes root in my heart

I nourish it with my soul.

I am here in the big city

Life moves fast here.

I want to join the milling crowds.

I feel that I am left behind,

I feel the world forgot to take me along,

It goes on without me.

He dives into the city head on,

He glows like a star.

The world waits for him,

The world waits on him.

I watch as he shines

I watch him glow

from behind the curtain.

I work behind the curtain,

I enrich

I nourish

But I stay within the shadows.

He glows

He shines

He lights up the night sky

Like a firework.

In his grandeur,

I am but a tiny speck

A fleck of dust

That he brushes away.

I retreat into the shadows

Though I stop not my work.

I see him burn out,

He is but a firework.

He falls to the ground,

He falls with the ashes.

I am here,

The speck of dust.

I am here to pick up the pieces.

He does not want me around

He chooses another

He chose another.

He chose another

To love

He chose another

As his best companion

He chose

Another.

I disconnect

I am going to be strong,

I will leave

And I do.

I am now away.

I don't want him to find me.

But the world knows me now.

I am a new person now.

I thought he would have let go

I thought he would have given up on my soul.

But it is still with him,

Even when he does not know it.

He has crashed on the road of life.

I am here

To pick up the pieces again.

One piece of him draws blood.

I flee

But a piece remains in me.

He comes looking

For the missing piece.

Instead he finds me.

I wish to draw back,

I might get hurt again

But something draws me

Draws me back to where he was standing.

I am now his

He is mine.

The bond is unshakeable

It grows stronger with time.

It is the stuff of angels

The way he loves me

And I love him.

I know it is the stuff of angels.

Destiny is cruel

It snatches me away.

I look upon him

From my home in the sky.

I'd give anything to say

What had reamined unsaid.

Anything to do again

What came undone.

I loved you with all my heart,

Even when you didn'n love me.

I loved you

Even when you scorned me.

I will keep loving you

Even when you stop loving me.

When I look back

You are what I cherish the most.

And though I am away

And it seems like I disconnected

I am still there

In your heart;

Never for once forgetting

It is the abode I treasure the most.

P.S. I speak here as Emma Morley, the leading lady in the movie One Day. Though I saw the movie a while ago, I only got around to writing this today. Emma Morley is one character that I have identified with in a long time. That said, I didn't understand her love for Dexter Mayhew, which is why though this poem expresses Emma, it may not be able to do justice to Emma's love for Dexter.

The happily Never afters

I was watching the Hugh Grant, Julia Roberts starer 'Notting Hill' for the nth time today, after a very long gap I might add. It is one of my favourite romantic comedies of all times.


But when I watched it today, I didn't feel the exhilaration I have felt when I watched it earlier. I realised I had a problem with the ending. That is not how it happens in real life. The guy does not come dashing through the traffic to accept his mistake. In real life, the story ends when Anna (Roberts) leaves the shop after being turned down.


I am not blaming the guys in this piece. Girls are do that equally. What I am blaming are the movies, the songs, the books (some of them). Who can, in the real world, claim to have found true love? The kind that all the songs and movies keep talking about. As in the light headed, floating in the air, rose tinted glasses kind? I think this whole thing can be equated to one particular character- Edward Cullen. He is, by far, the best analogy I could find. Edward is a dream for every woman but he is exactly that- a dream. He does not exist in real life. It is also what can be precisely said of the whole 'true love' phenomenon- it does not exist in real life.



Where have you seen spectacular admissions of love like you have in 'Notting Hill', 'Someone like You' or even 'Jab We Met'? They are just fantasies. I would classify them with something like Star Wars- brilliantly done, excellent creativity BUT does not have an ounce of truth to it. And most people, like the fanboys of Star Wars, believe in the fantasy and hope it is true when it never will be, leading to nothing more than depression in all parties involved.

I am tempted to quote a line from a movie (which is true, for once) 'Love and Other Disasters'- "True love is a conspiracy between the music, film and book industries. Where is it except in books, movies and songs?"

For as I see around myself, it is always a happily Never after all the time.

Its time to bloom

Waking up this morning,
I felt the ray dance on my cheek,
The dew gave me a kiss.
I closed my eyes again
And made a wish.

The snow has melted away,
I have been buried too long,
I opened my eyes
And winked at the sun.

Its been a long winter,
I slept through it.
Its time to wake up now,
Its time to bloom.

The sleep was filled with many nightmares
And many pleasant dreams.
But I want to forget all of them now,
Dreams are, after all, a part of sleep.
They don't last longer than that.

It is now time
Time to bloom,
Time for a new life,
Time to shake off the past
Time to open the eyes towards a new sun.
The time to rise
And shine like the sun.

I bow down
And thank God
For the gift of life
And the gifts of love
That I receive from all around.
I thank Him for every little thing
That I have been blessed with.

I dont want
To be stuck in the past,
I have to clear out
All of it
That still remains in me.
I have spent enough time
Buried in it,
Trying without success
To get out.
The sun has finally decided to shine
It has released by bonds.

It is now time
To rise and shine.
It is now time
To step up
And take my place under the sun.

It is time!

Walking through the sunshine

The eternal sunshine of a spotless mind


The world forgetting and by the world forgot,

I walk through the sun coz a care I have not.

There's a spring in my step

A song on my lips.

I am looking on to the road ahead.



The road beckons me

It's holding its arms open for me

I move forward to embrace it.

I cannot wait to sail the high seas

For there is nothing I keep back.



I set out free as a bird

Flying away to new lands

Home can will be any place I choose to stop

There is nothing I keep back



Flying through the skies

Soaring over the sea,

I saw you in a distance

And you saw me.



You passed me by

And I began to follow

You almost had me on a leash

Why? I cannot follow



You are the exotic

You pull me towards you

Why do you seem familiar?

Do I know you?

You pull me on

As if by an invisible leash.

I don't know why

But you have me.

It is the hows and whys that

I cannot figure out.

But I let them lie

For I am with you

And it matters not.

Good night my beloved

I say as I fall asleep.

In my dreams,

I see you again

But we've only just met.

You hold my hand

And take me into the journey.

This is the journey of my own life.

But how are you here?

Coz we've only just met.

You show me our past

Past which had both you and me.

When you and I were together

When I was so happy

Words were not enough to describe.

I confessed how much I loved you

But you were the free spirit.

You flew away leaving me bereft.

It hurt me inside

It hurt so bad

I couldn't even cry.

I decided to take you away from me

When I realised you had taken me away from you.

I tried to throw everything out

To remove all trace

To forget I even knew you.

Alas I failed!

You are not a part of me

You are me

Try as I might,

I cannot get away from me.

You are ingrained in me

So deep, I cannot even reach

The depths of my soul

You've taken me over completely.

I dont know why you left

I dont know why you didnt turn back.

It seems it was easy for you.

It is not so easy for me.

I hold on

I would not let go.

You are safe with me.

You will be with me

Even after you left.

It is beyond my control

But I wouldn't chain you for the world.

I hold on to my memories

Keeping them as my personal treasure.

Even though I let you go

May you stay happy forever.

Though I ask for one promise

If you meet me on a street,

Just greet me like a friend

It is all I need to make me happy

In the end.

P.S. This poem is written as an ode to the movie 'Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind' and I am writing this as Joel Barish (protagnist).

It may seem a bit different from what happens in the movie. That's coz I saw it a while ago and I got around to writing this only now. Hence it turns more into my own interpretation rather than character speak.

Hope you like it!

The last glance

I am sitting at my desk
Looking at the world outside.
Life seems to go on without me,
I feel I am left behind.

I feel I am not a part of it anymore
It feels all alien to me.
I am not a part of it anymore

I am encased in a shell
A shell only you can break open.
But you are with me in it
And yet you are too far from me
Too far to hear the cry
That is yet to escape from my lips.

You, who heard me think
You, who thought like me
You, who were a part of me
As much as I was a part of you.

It is has been long since ....
You left.
But I am still holding on to you.
As yet I have never been able
To break the connection.
There is nothing to break,
Since you are me
And I you.

We are far apart
But I can never forget the last glance.
When I turned around to say goodbye
And you were standing there waving to me.
We proceeded to our separate journeys,
Not thinking how far apart they would take us.

I took you with me
And left myself with you.
In little beads of remembrance
I left myself with you.
In little beads of remembrance
I took you with me.

I keep mine safe
Locked away from prying eyes.
They are so precious
They are only mine.
People steal with their eyes.

You are so far away
Yet you know what goes on in my mind.
I am preparing for my journey
To join you where you are.

I must lock everything,
Leave everything in array.
A word to everyone
For they should know what is to be done.

One can go away from places
One can go away from people
But never can one
Go away from oneself.

I long for your arms
Which held me minutes before we parted.
I want to get back in that shelter
And never come out again.

I wish to come to you
I don't care how long the journey takes
Or how painful it is.
Just hope your arms wait for me
As I cannot wait for them.

Today as I shall
Close my eyes in my world.
I hope to open them in yours
And see the world through your eyes.

I am glad that the goodbye
Would not last forever.
For I shall be reunited with you soon
For ever and ever.

P.S. For those who are concerned about my sanity, I have not lost it. This poem is just an ode to the movie 'A Single Man'.
I have just put myself into the shoes of George Falconer (the protagonist, for those who have not seen the movie) and put words to his feelings with my own personal touch.

My fav cliches

I had done my last post on the biggest Hindi movie cliche of them all, the Hindi film heroine, the prettiest prop of them all!.





Here are some of my other fave cliches from both old and new movies ( I had posted some of them on Poonam Saxena's HT blog earlier but they are entirely my own!)





My favourite romantic/family cliches:


- Rich kid NEVER falls in love with fellow rich kid. They always find some ayah/ driver/mechanic's kid to fall in love with. Some socialists these guys!

- Heroines washed their hair everyday! No one was worried about hair fall or anything. That too first thing in the morning. Guess all of our heroines are very early risers and neat freaks

- Heroes are never the guy next door. They were always scholarship winners/awesome sportsmen/really popular guy for no apparent reason.

- Heroines, though the very model of moral values, always managed to get pregnant before marriage. They apparently had not heard of contraception.

- Heroines/ heroes always had a very snoopy and very bitchy aunt who would keep finding faults in them &/or tormenting them.

- Whenever heroine/hero was feeling sad or looking back at the mess they have made of their lives, they wear glasses, notwithstanding the fact that they can see perfectly clearly for miles in other parts of the film.

- Hero/ heroine had to lose one (or both) parents before 25. Usually before adulthood.

- I was cribbing about the career choices for women. Come to think of it, the men did not have much of an option too. They were either engineers/ doctors/ Policemen (favourite)/ mafia/ small time crooks/ physical labor. Does not seem like much of a selection to choose from.

- The hero n heroine just have to meet in a park in a slope where they can roll down like Jack n Jill at any time.

- The park was also good for PDA - in the guise of flowers of course!

- Gal had to have a negative IQ to be thought innocent and lovable. Any figment of ambition was highly discouraged. Even if the heroine was thoroughly brilliant, she was bound to the home by some stupid (often unnecessary) quirk of fate.

- Guy had to an equally low IQ to match. He was never able to figure out that he was being used by the villain in some way.

- And of course, the wonderful monsoon. Always reliable, it always showed up in time for hero-heroine to get wet together/ heroine to get wet n hero to stare followed by more botanical love scenes.

- Older men were never faithful to their wives. The father was always gone away to town to work/ play the fool/ hide after some crime he committed or dead. It was always up to the mother to raise the kids. What's more, the father often vanished without any money. So the mother (mostly uneducated) had to take up a job as a labourer/ kaamwali bai/ cleaner with her boss staring at her with all the wrong intentions.

Some courtroom cliches:

- How can anyone forget the Insaaf ki devi complete with her blindfold and scales?And more or less everyone, n I mean everyone had a law degree( inclusive of the blind maji) and have a license to argue in the court?

- Bad guy shooting the honest gavah/ hero’s dad/ honest masterji and running scot free. Finally in the climax getting shot by hero in the same court with same judge, same police wallah etc etc.

- Anyone can saunter in through the doors of the court and scream, “Thehro!!!”

- Hero sitting in the Judge sahib ki kursi in the climax, ‘Ab faisla main khud karunga’

- Hero ki maa running straight to judge’s desk and saying, 'mere bache par rehem khayiye, judge sahib, main aapke haath jodti hoon’

- Judge going, ‘Kya aap apni safai mein kuchh kehna chahte hain?’ (nothing to do with any cleanliness!)

- Lawyers saying, ‘mere fazil dostyeh bhool rahe hain ki…..”

- Hero gets to give one last kiss/ hug to herione before being wisked away to bees saal ki sazah.

- Lawyers were also masters of both Hindi and Urdu and loved to pepper their defence copiously with idioms, sayings etc but never quoted the Indian Constitution.

- Somehow, the only penal codes were 302 (murder) and 420 (trickery). The rest of the Constitution was just there to fill in pages.

- Hero/ heroine never takes help of a lawyer. They are more knowledgable about precedents, the Constitution of India, circumstantial evidence, forensics themselves than any black coated crow.

Some Doctor cliches:

- Doctor could run an instant pregnancy test by simply checking the heroine’s pulse.

- Heroine realises she’s pregnant only after she vomits in the teesra mahina.

-Humne bache ko to bacha liya par ma ko nahin bacha sake or vice versa after some deadly tragedy hits the pregnant woman.

- Doctor’s advice is perfectly orchestrated to backgorund music, moanful or happy as the case may be.

-They never seem to know of any blood banks, the dutiful parivaar ke log had to donate precious blood to the ailing fellow.

- T.B/ cancer were detected only in the terminal stage and the doctor would shake his head and say, “yeh chand dino ke mehman hain.”

- Cancer or T.B. spread faster than common cold in the movies.

- The only method of detection of aforementioned ailment was khoon in the khansi that too spat out on a white handkerchief.

- The patient always managed to spit out blood no matter what type of cancer they had. Well, I would give the benefit of doubt here. They never mentioned the type of cancer in any movie except Anand. Peculiarly, the most common type of cancer is Blood Cancer (again type not mentioned!)

- The nurse kept to take care of the aforementioned patient was always sleeping/ knitting/ yakking with nauker and forgot all about the dose timings. It always fell on the dear heroine to wake up in the middle of the night and say, “aapki dawah ka samay ho gaya”

- Blood was always donated Live. Both donor and receipient lying in adjoining cots in the same room.

- Monitors continuously beep if a patient is critical.

- Anyone can saunter into a ICU room wearing a white lab coat and poison the patient/ turn off the oxygen/ some critical machine.

Long list! Watch out, will get longer with time as i watch more and more movies!

Welcome to add stuff to the list

I hate Luv Storys

Didn't think I'd find myself saying it but there you have it, I hate love stories!

Me the eternal rom com lover, thunder strike, lightening please! ;)


Anyhow, I have my reasons for this. It is the portrayal of the gal in these movies that I hate, from the bottom of my heart. Was watching DDLJ the other day, Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge for those not clued in.

Pretty much all Kajol does is just romp about pining for her 'unknown' lover. Same goes for Madhuri Dixit in Dil to Pagal Hai. Only difference between the two is that one dances about in London whilst the other is gallivanting around in Mumbai.


Never seen Hindi movie leading ladies follow any profession whatsoever. Ok, I concede that the yesteryear ladies atleast worked for a living (atleast some of them). Cases in point: Neetu Singh in Amar Akbar Anthony- doctor, Vidya Sinha in Chhoti Si Baat-works in an office, and of course, Suchitra Sen as the politician in Aandhi. Atleast the moms had the some sort of vocation. Who can forget Nirupa Roy as a labourer, tailor etc (also always sick, this woman was seriously immunodeficient).



But among the current movies, mostly the gals are just bimbos and do nothing except roam around in beautiful clothes, sing songs, fall in love and of course, get into trouble for the hero to save. There are of course notable exceptions (Deepika Padukone in most of her movies) but for the most part they are doing nothing more by way of a profession. Even the proverbial de-glam movies like Kaminey showed no specific profession for its leading lady Priyanka.

The maximum career choices that a girl can make according to Hindi movies is showbiz (model/actress/singer), social worker (or a police officer), healthcare (doctor/nurse) or in the rarest of rare cases, journalism (you have to be the daring, loose moraled gal if you want this!).

Only rare mentions can be found of the girl being an executive, never of a woman engineer, or a woman scientist. Heaven forbid if she chooses to become a banker or worse, a pilot!

It is always a woman who is hardly seen at work and must spend most of her time in the confines of home and hearth. Quite contrary to real life in urban areas where most woman work in some way or the other. This does not even hold true for the rural society where women often supplement the household income by working in small cottage industries.

The common Indian psyche is influenced in a big way by movies. According to the film makers, the films are reflective of society. Never believed that lie! The Hindi movies still manage to cast a shadow of doubt on any woman who works hard and has capabilities beyond those of the kitchen.

Me talking to me

I made myself a promise a year ago that I will take more time to be with myself more.


I can't say I fulfilled this promise completely but yes, I did make an effort. I do take time to record my feelings, read them over taking time to laugh, cry or experience all those emotions all over again. Sickness that happened 8 months ago, fun had over the last few weeks, conversations that were little more than castles in the air; I was glad to go over them again, glad to feel that I have someone to stand by me, that I'm there for me.



I may be separated from all loved ones by half the earth but the umbilical cord is still attached. I am still connected in a way so intimate that I cannot see myself as a separate entity from that world. The physical truth, however, remains that I am no longer in that sheltered surrounding. That I have begun a life that requires me to get away from where I was born, where I existed, where there is a hint of me in every nook and cranny, where I still reside subconsciously.



But I have found in this new world, a new best friend, me. I am now taking care of me, making sure I finish my work on time, I eat properly and scolding me if I dont stick to what I planned. It feels nice since now I don't need a chaperone all the time.

It is a new feeling, a feeling of being born again. It is a feeling unknown to me before this but it is one of the best ones I've ever had. It is kind of like waking up to a new aroma, somewhat like the transformation in Karthik of Karthik Calling Karthik. Only here, the transformation is taking place on a conscious level rather than on a subconscious (or schizophreniac) level.

Hope it only goes forward from here. Amen!

Looking outside the window

I was just sitting there looking outside my window, to see the beautiful white morning.



Beautiful but cold. It looked picture perfect from inside the glass, one you could save and put up as your wallpaper on the screen. It is only when you got outside that you realised the extent of the cold. The cold that hits you like a slap.



Seems quite like the world outside. You are yearning to go out into the world as a kid, yearning for the day they would become adults, when they would be allowed to do whatever they please. But when they enter into the real world, it hits them (us) hard, really hard.




There was a quote that said, 'Destiny had a sense of humour'. Truely agree with it. At the moment, I think of the boy from The Alchemist, who goes all the way to the pyramids in Egypt to look for his destiny, his treasure but realises after going through all that trouble that hs treasure was buried right in his backyard. He went through a lot of hardship to get to his treasure, he sold his sheep, moved to a new country, learned a new alien language, got robbed thrice, travelled into the desert in the middle of a war and almost lost his life to thieves. It was only when he reached the pyramids, got tired of digging that God told him that his true treasure lay where he had been before he started on this journey. "Then why did you send me here?", he asked God. He said, " Because I wanted you to see the Pyramids. Aren't they beautiful?"



Its weird talking about Destiny's sense of humor.... stuff that you took as pre ordained, in the end turned out to be a note from hell. But it is up to one to laugh and to move on. A lot of tension stems from the fact that even though Destiny served us with a joke, we forgot to laugh but instead took it as an offence, bristling on about how 'it just had to happen to me!' or the more common, 'why me?????'



People may think of me as an idiot for saying this but it really is always easier to laugh and move on. Even if you are stuck with something, just disconnect yourself from it emotionally and just look at the scenario as it were playing in the form of a movie.

The world is not a bed of roses, nor is it a bed of thorns.

Taking both in my stride, I am going to move on....

Life's a journey and I wanna go far,

Keeping the door ajar

So I may come back home the day I want.

I wanna see the world

But come back home at the end of the day.

I don't want to live my life travelling the high seas.

Taking Destiny's joke in my stride

I would want to laugh and move on.

Hope life gives me a chance and my life goes on......

Mile sur mera tumhara

Hi again.

Things have moved, changed at a speed that would be insulted if I would call it breakneck. Had not had the time (or inclination) to write in a long time. Never felt like it. Good excuse you may say but the creative minded would understand what I am trying to say.

The world around forced me to get back to writing. Not all that's happening in my life but what has been happening in the world. It feels like the world is going up in hate. Between countries, between states, between cultures, between..... people.

The prime differentiating quality of the human race is the uniqueness of each member, the beauty of being human lies essentially in being different. Then why on earth are weso hell bent upon using these differences as a bone of contention betwen us?

Watching the news, I feel people have become shameless enough to make the ultimate sacrifice sound frivolous. People who have been chanting the mantra of regionalism idealise all the wrong heroes. All those that created strife become idols while all those that rose up in their fields with hard work and dedication are subjected to insult and those that laid down their lives are made a mockery of.

While the world prays for heroes like Hemant Karkare and Tukaram Omble, some have been vile enough to make fun of or nit pick in their sacrifices. My hate for people like the Thackerays would have lessened if they would have been sensible enough to honour these great men (Marathi manoos both) or used their positions to see to it that their families were well taken care of.

I am appalled! At people who are mongering hate when there are better things to be done with their time. Even more at those that swallow it and have nothing better to do with their lives than burn cars, pelt stones and such over non issues. A lot more at the government who has not been able to bring them to book. The Indian Constitution forbids any sort of discrimination on the basis of religion, region, gender or language, then why are these people allowed to go scot free even when they have been responsible for the deaths of so many people?

I wonder at how these people are able to sleep at night. Atleast for me, I have trouble getting to sleep if I hurt someone's feelings that day. These guys have blood on their hands and still they seem unruffled.

Where has the solidarity of the Indian nation vanished? The concept of 'many people, one nation' seems to be lost in the noise of regional and religional voices. I really feel we should make all these people sit down and watch 'Mile sur mera tumhara' over and over and over again till they realise the importance of peace.

'Mile sur mera tumhara' essentially describes the feeling and meaning of being Indian and on a very broad perspective, being human. The fact that we are all different yet we can live in harmony with each other is simple to read but difficult to understand for a lot of people it seems.

They should be made to cook all sorts of food, it is only then that they will realise that it is only when all the spices mix together that it makes for a truly delicious dish!

no title

Yup, u read it right, this post has no title to define it. Just some randomn thoughts put together.
HT has excellent blogs. Loved reading them today. Liked Poonam Saxena and Naomi Canton best. Read naomi's wierd dating experience. Reminded me of one such "lover" that I had 2 years ago. Weirdo. What business did he have snooping around on my sister's profile after I had clearly told him to get lost. Got stuck to me like Feviquick.
Lot of people I know who get stuck to u like the proverbial superglue. Aargh! Trouble to get loose from them. Can't seem to take the hint. I once ended up saying bye to this girl 5 times before she finally let me go.
Kinda like those tele callers. Why on earth would a student wanna listen to home loan schemes or investment programmes but no, they switch on like a record player without a stop button.
Reminds me I gotta check if my all-in-one is working fine. Got it repaired a few days ago. Awesome gadget. Fulfills my gratification for music.
Hindi movie music these days is just soooooo much like noise. Ok leaving out respectable Rehman melodies. Rehman's an awesome musician. The world finally woke up to him with Slumdog. Good movie that. Loved everyone. Except Frieda Pinto. I feel that she's hogging the limelight for that minuscule role of hers. The kids n teens did a waaaay better job that 2 of her combined.
Reminds me, I have tocombine to papers to make notes for my exams. Dat reminds me, its almost 2 at night. I gotta get to bed
Good night
Gotta switch on the mosquito repellent.
Double check all doors.
Good night finally

Privacy? What's dat?

Was just reading about Jade Goody's death. A caption said: 'Life lived in front of the cameras'. Pretty true for her. She's been in front of the camera continuously for the last 7 years. Long time yaar.


I pity her. Really do. Not because she died of cancer at the young age of 27 but because since the time she was 20, she's lived under constant scrutiny.


Hate to think what it would feel like to have people watching every move, every outburst for whole time. More significantly, they are always passing judgement on you.


I pitied her at the time of the racial abuse controversy. What probably was just an emotional outburst in a fight was made into an international controversy. I mean, who hasn't screamed the choicest abuses in a fight? The Ma, behen ki galis(I needn't elaborate, everyone knows them by heart) that are hurled in a simple road fight are a greater insult to a person than racial abuse. But still noone bats an eyelid there. Moral standards, however, change drastically on national television, international in this case.


Another league of people I pity are movie stars. Every move, every word, even a look is under the public eye, literally! No wonder they keep losing their bearings so frequently. It is my idea of a nightmare. Not ghosts, not the past but the public eye. How do I care how many people has Kareena been in a relationship with, or who's the latest gal in Shahid's life, or whether Angie actually slapped Brad? But there are a lot of people who do care and those who will do anything to tell others what went on behind the closed doors.
Things just change their meaning once more people are involved. The first sacrifice at the altar of fame is the most personal: privacy. I hate people who agree to go into the Big Boss (Big Brother, suit urself) house. I find them to be the most desperate people, people who have no self respect. For me the lowest thing someone can do is to expose themselves to the prying eyes of the cameras, 24/7.
Even lower are those people who indulge in 'Kiss n tell'. Selling their most private moments like their night outs, honeymoon, wedding, birth of children to the media for a price tag. Some things are so special, so fragile that you want just your dear ones around you, not every stray hick on the road.
I still am at a loss to understand why people are so desperate for fame that they can sell their most personal memories. I pity them!

Update

Hi,
Writing after a gap of almost two looooooong years. Yes, they have been long, in every sense of the word. Things happened at home, at college, to me emotionally, things that took up a lot of my time. Result, I stopped writing altogether. Not just on my blog but altogether.
But I have made a resolution, 'middle of the year?' you may say but then, you don't need to look at the calender to make a promise to yourself.
I made a promise to myself sometime ago, I will pay more attention to me from now on! Life has been spent living for people, things, grades and all else that's in it. Life without these would be unimaginable. But then, without me, my life would not exist.
From now on, I have promised myself some 'me' time. Time dat would be spent by me on me. Life with its breakneck speed has taken away all the time dat you would spend wid urself. I have in the past two years found time to speak to every one, including family, friends, classmates, ex-classmates, juniors, seniors, labmates, maintenance people, teachers, even the maid but sadly, never myself. I have quite forgotten what I look like. For perverts, I would like to clarify its not what I see in the mirror every morning but what I feel like.
This blog shall now be my conversations with myself. Others are welcome to read but its predominantly me talking to me.
Let's hope I fulfill this resolution! Fingers crossed!

Lonely....

Lonely,
I'm Mr. Lonely
I have nobody to call my own....

Hey i'm not going to paste the very sweet but sad Akon song here but the new story was woven around this song......

Well lets get bk to Jyoti again.......
She has now completed school and has started with college already....

She was happy to be in a new environment, the whole grown up feeling, independence, great work...... in short, she just loved this place.
Everything was going hunky dory till one fine day, she got a call from her friend Nita at school. Their friend Avinash had proposed to her n she was over the moon......
Soon, this was followed up by a lot of pairs being formed both among her school n college friends.
It wasnt as if their were no couples around in school but Jyoti now felt a sharp pain in herself.....

She too wanted a pair. She had started with the pangs of loneliness get to her..... At times, she felt alone even among her new friends bcoz everyone except her ws in pairs...
the song came rushing back to her in the most painful manner......
The urge to love n to be loved was just breaking her up into pieces......

She was well aware of the adage, 'someone for everyone' but it was the wait that was killing her....
Anyhow one day, through a law portal in the chatrooms(she was a law student), she found someone she thought was perfect for her.....
They sat on the net for hours discussing merger laws(their fav topic) and abt the stuff they liked n disliked....
She new that he was the guy whose attitude matched her and she fell in love with the person she chatted with on the net.....

There was only one problem.....
"LA lawyer" was how she knew him, he was supposed to be a lawyer intern in LA n that they both loved whipped cream on their ice cream n they loved strawberry cream cake.
She was well aware of the dangers of net relationships...... but she could not put down her feelings......
What could she do???????

What is love?

Love.....
A lot's been said,
A lot's been written
A lot's been.....
never mind!!!!!!!!!

One morning,
On a bright sunny day,
I asked the sun:
"hey buddy, what is love?"

"Beats me, kid!", he said
"I've never had a chance
To look around,
Find a gal in my stead!
All I've ever done,
Is to go round and round
Never looked, never found!"

On a rainy day,
I asked the cloud,
"Tell me sir, What is love?"

"Love is lightening!", he said,
"It tears you to pieces
But it still is...
The light of your life.
My lightening's my love,
She lives in me
And I,
In her."

On a beautiful night,
I asked the moon,
" So what is Love?"
" Love is a Star!", he said,
"It makes you go over the moon!!!!!!!!
She lights up my life!
She dispells the darkness of the night.
For her, I stay up the whole night."

Then I asked the earth one day,
" What do you think is love?"
" Love is every flower on my bosom,
Every li'l animal that I nourish,
Every tree that grows on me."

" Love is not just cherishing beauty,
Its not just sharing of joy,
Its not just about having fun together,
Its about nourishing with your life,
Its about cherishing the soul,
Its more important to share your sorrows.'

"Love is to cherish each other,
No matter how far,
No matter how close.
Love is the intertwining of souls
Not just comtemplating each other!"

"Take time to love, my dear,
It is the food for the soul",
So said the Earth.
And I knew I had understood
"What is Love!!!!!!!!"

Care to give your opinion???????

Okie, lets tell you another story:

There was this gal, lets call her..... Jyoti. She was in school and had a nice circle of friends. However, when she went to a new school, the new people around welcomed her warmly. She was good friends with them.
Jyoti was an awesome artist and won many many competitions and awards. This stirred jealousy among her new 'friends'. After winning a particularly prestigious competition, she stirred strong adverse feelings among this new group and they started mocking her work to the hilt.
It really hurt Jyoti for she had never tried to hurt anyone. This went on for the next 2 years. The gap between her and her classmates just widened with time. The mocking just grew with each passing day.
Then at the end of school, one of her classmates posted stuff against her on their class blog. Jyoti was hurt badly and swore never to talk to these classmates ever again. But one fine day, one of the particularly malicious classmates called her and wanted to apologise. The next day, another one called and apologised for all that had happened in the last 2 years.
Jyoti considered forgiving them but still was not able to get over the public insult that she had faced on the internet. Then, she received an email from one of these guys which was again pretty much made fun of her.
The class was now planning a trip in the coming vacations after the class 12 results and she was invited too. Jyoti never wanted to go coz she knew the she would end up being the butt of jokes. But somehow, her classmated were insistent. Should she go?

A Story

Well, hi. I will tell you a story today. Its true or not? You may judge yourself.

Once there were these 2 girls: lets call them Anu n Annie.
They first became friends when they were in class 3. They were very dear friends. Of them, Anu was more emotional, can say that she was an emotional fool but Annie was more in control of her emotions.
Their friendship continued very happily till class 6. Then, new girls joined school and Annie got more interested in the more hip gang and Anu went further into the background on her friend list.
Days turned into weeks and weeks into months. Almost at the end of class 6, one day one of Annie's very hip friends teased Anu for her simple dressing. Anu, though simple, was not easily putdownable. The fight grew taking Annie into its fold. Annie, however, sided with her very high nosed friend.
This broke Anu's heart. She could stand up against the world but not her best friend. She rushed out of the room crying and Annie did not follow. Then, without a word being said, their friendship was over!!!!!
Things remained more or less the same for the following 2 years. However, in class 9 when they were made to sit together, the ice started melting. The queerest thing brought them close together- their mutual love of maths. Things got better and they were friends again, not as close as earlier but good enough.
Then in class 11, they both took part in an art competition. Anu made it to the next level but Annie despite being an equally good artiste got left out. She never said anything to Anu, not even congratulations.
Anu managed a great performance in the next level and received a certificate of appreciation for her efforts. The principal lauded her achievement in the assembly. That day in class, Annie passed a sneering comment about some 'snobbish artists' and that hit Anu straight to the heart. A few days later, Annie changed her school and did not even bother telling Anu. For the next 2 years, even though Anu tried contacting Annie, Annie never bothered. This was an iron blow to their friendship.
Then suddenly one day after their 12th boards were over, Annie called Anu. They were very glad to be speaking to each other and the ice melted in the summer that followed. But........
These 2 years were very different for each of them and their worlds changed like anything in this time.
They are good friends today but have missed a lot in each other's lives. Anu longs for the friendship they once had but Annie shows no emotion about it. Whenever they talk or meet, its always good natured interaction but there still is a vacuum in there.
Should they continue as they are, separate altogether or try to revive the friendship that once was?

लाइफ or something like it......

Well this happens to be the first post on my blog. To tell you about me, I am a student giving my final exams right now......
Won't bore you with the exam details but yes, I like to dream big and try my best to fulfill it.
This blog is about my life...... what happens daily, things that make me sad, things that really are what I would like to share with people....
Will keep you posted. Watch this space