Me talking to me

I made myself a promise a year ago that I will take more time to be with myself more.


I can't say I fulfilled this promise completely but yes, I did make an effort. I do take time to record my feelings, read them over taking time to laugh, cry or experience all those emotions all over again. Sickness that happened 8 months ago, fun had over the last few weeks, conversations that were little more than castles in the air; I was glad to go over them again, glad to feel that I have someone to stand by me, that I'm there for me.



I may be separated from all loved ones by half the earth but the umbilical cord is still attached. I am still connected in a way so intimate that I cannot see myself as a separate entity from that world. The physical truth, however, remains that I am no longer in that sheltered surrounding. That I have begun a life that requires me to get away from where I was born, where I existed, where there is a hint of me in every nook and cranny, where I still reside subconsciously.



But I have found in this new world, a new best friend, me. I am now taking care of me, making sure I finish my work on time, I eat properly and scolding me if I dont stick to what I planned. It feels nice since now I don't need a chaperone all the time.

It is a new feeling, a feeling of being born again. It is a feeling unknown to me before this but it is one of the best ones I've ever had. It is kind of like waking up to a new aroma, somewhat like the transformation in Karthik of Karthik Calling Karthik. Only here, the transformation is taking place on a conscious level rather than on a subconscious (or schizophreniac) level.

Hope it only goes forward from here. Amen!